I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
