my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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