i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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