dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize