I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
my shit smells like andre
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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