I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize