I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
