Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
And then he peed in my hair
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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