why didn't you poke me back
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
