she takes plan B like it's going out of style
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
