Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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