Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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