My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
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