idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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