I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
i need some magic done to my vagina
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize