whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
