Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
