I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
