the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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