They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
How's work?
Spinning.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Blow job season was short but glorious.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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