Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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