You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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