its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I wish i was in the wii world.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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