No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize