Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
