508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize
