The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Randomize
