Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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