My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Randomize
