Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize