So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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