But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Swine flu is the new snow day.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Randomize
