im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
