Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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