i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
