hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
