oh god the rape fog is back!
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i just sent this text using only my big toe
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize
