I think scott just propositioned me for sex
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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