Quick, to the slutcave!
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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