Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
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