so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I AM VODKA MAN
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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