Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
