The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
