They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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