I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
