hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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