My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
