did you get engaged???
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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