I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
