Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize