Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
