Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
