He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize
